For the last four years I've jumped from relationship to relationship. I've had four serious boyfriends. One taught me that you can be friends with your exs, the second taught me how to really love someone but also how to hate, the third deserved so much more than me and the fourth was my boss, that was, erm, interesting to say the least.
Now i'm single for the first time since I was sixteen years old, I claim all I want to do is have fun. Since I broke up with my boss, I've fooled around with three guys, slept with one and kissed uncountable amounts. Yes I'm aware that is slutty but it has been five months.
Now, one of them wants to be 'friends with benefits'. My head said 'yeah why not', my heart may as well have broken into a thousand pieces the second I nodded my head.
This guy has a girlfriend. We talked about him below, remember his 'situation'? We've been talking for months because of work but from the second I left his side on Thursday night to right now, I've not stopped thinking about him. I keep asking myself when I became that girl. The girl that every other girl dreads, hates and claims they'll never become. The other part me, pretending to fully understand his 'situation', says why the hell not?
How long will I cope with having a F-W-B for before I'm crying myself to sleep at night? Probably not that long. At all. In fact, I'd give myself two weeks, and that's pushing it. Experience shows that as a girl you can't just watch films, get drunk and fuck somebody without eventually falling for them - particularly when from the word go you are stupidly attracted to them. Where do I go from here?
I am quite fond of my heart being in one piece, so why am I playing these games?
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